While working on my very first conference (programming) session I’ve started having something that might resemble mini panic attacks and strikes of stupidity. I swear I’ve rewritten the session about ten times, and each time I review a recorded session I find faults, and I start doubting myself. Pretty much, the more I learn, the more stupid I feel. Does that make any sense?
Let me just state that I didn’t feel so particularly smart to begin with, so this poses a problem for me. It renders me momentarily lost for self-esteem. Worst case scenarios can get pretty bad, so that thinking-trick won’t help me very much. Instead I try to think, I’m giving a piece of me. I don’t quite feel like a phoney, I just feel…. stupid? So my question is to senior developers, as I have no answer today:
Is it normal to feel more stupid the more you learn?
And if so, is this a good sign or a bad sign?
And does this ever pass?
And in RE to holding conference sessions, do you ever feel ready?